When faced with a challenge, or an opportunity, which dog do you feed?

Jon Gordon writes in his book, The Positive Dog, "We all have a positive-versus-negative battle going on each day. Every moment and every situation presents to us an opportunity to see and experience the positive or the negative."

"We can feed the positive dog or the negative dog inside of us, and whichever one we feed, grows. So feed the positive dog."

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Focus on the positive. Experience the positive. Seek to find the gift presented through each opportunity.

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

Which dog do you feed?

Which part of you do you want to grow?

Feed the positive dog.

Create your life.

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I am grateful for family and friends, health, smiles, laughter, sunshine, and family gatherings (even when they are virtual).

Take a moment today and reflect. 

We have much for which to be thankful.

Create your life.

Who is your hero?

If you are like me, you might have many heroes.

I recently lost one of those I would consider a hero.

My father-in-law passed away last week.

He was a hero to me.

I admired

👍 how easily he could laugh at himself

👍 how easily he could laugh at most everything

👍 his easy-going smile

👍 his ability to not take himself too seriously

👍 how he could find joy in the smallest things

👍 his incredible generosity

👍 his affinity for ice cream

I never shared these things with him. Now I can't.

I find it hard to tell others what I appreciate about them, how I value them.

Maybe that stems from my challenge to tell myself what I appreciate about me.

We need heroes in our lives, whether they know their role or not.

We need people we admire, that inspire us, that set an example.

If we're lucky, we get to serve as a hero for others.

Our heroes help set our own course.

Why is someone your hero?

What can you do to integrate their good parts into who you want to become?

Create your life.

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This world is messed up. And yet, there is also a lot of good in the world.

We can all help to make our world a good place or at least a better place. A kind place.

We can all spread kindness.

World Kindness Day is celebrated each year on November 13th. Add it to your calendar!

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Two of my favorite ways to infuse kindness into someone's day:

🙂 Smile

🚪 Hold the door open

A few additional ways to #inspirekindness:

❤️ Write a note and leave it for someone to find

❤️ Practice gratitude

❤️ Tell someone you love them

❤️ Give someone a hug

❤️ Buy coffee for a stranger

❤️ Help a classmate with their homework

There are SO many ways! How do YOU #spreadkindness? Do you have a favorite? Please share!

Create your world. Make it one based on kindness.

Create your life.

Be kind.

❤️

I'm a card carrying member.

Not the infamous charge card.

I'm talking about the Procrastination Club!

It's right up there with the Perfectionist Club, which I am also a member, even as a recovering perfectionist.

For example, almost every week, I manage to put off writing my Thursday Thoughts until Wednesday night.

I tell myself this enables me to write about things that happen when they happen during the week.

While this is often true (I like sharing what I recently observe and think), this procrastination also puts a strain on me. It limits my sleep, causes some stress and anxiety, and creates unneeded pressure to get "the thing" done.

Does this resonate with you?

The unfortunate outcome is that I often produce fairly high-quality results when suffering from procrastination.

This usually serves to feed my inner critic and negative ego: "you cannot produce anything good unless you wait until the last minute."

That's a lie and also seemingly true at the same time.

I wish I had this figured out, how to avoid putting off what I know needs to be done.

👉 Preparing a presentation.

👉 Studying for an exam.

👉 Scheduling an appointment.

👉 Rescheduling an appointment.

👉 Caulking the shower.

Sure, there are only so many hours in a day.

Yes, I could prioritize better so the important items get done before the rest.

It sure is easier said than done.

When I procrastinate less, when I do "the thing" sooner than later, I feel more relaxed and less overwhelmed.

And, the results still have high quality.

It comes down to making choices.

Like so many things in life, when we are intentional about where we point our attention, we get more of what we want. We can get things done.

Make your choice.

Create your life.

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Don’t go chasing waterfalls.

Why not?!

What is it about waterfalls that makes them so intriguing? Why do we seek them out as a destination?

While on vacation last week, we explored multiple instances of water flowing over a vertical drop.

What we witnessed was...

Natural beauty.

Constant motion.

Power.

Cleansing force with life-giving and life-taking qualities.

A relaxing effect.

Improved mood and mental health.

A detox from our urban lifestyle.

A way to explore the world around.

Go ahead, chase that waterfall and the next and the next.

Receive the benefits associated with witnessing natural beauty that cannot be ignored.

Create your life.

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This sign appeared in a bakery I recently visited with my wife.

What a great recommendation!

The cinnamon rolls were amazing. So were the other baked goods we enjoyed from this bakery.

Being kinder to yourself is also amazing.

It made me wonder, how might I do this? How might others also do this?

A few ideas:

👍 Treat yourself the way you treat others

👍 Talk to yourself less critically and with more love

👍 Visit Kristin Neff’s website about self-compassion

👍 Smile when you look in the mirror

👍 Give yourself a hug

Being kinder to yourself will help you live with more fulfillment.

Definitely order the cinnamon rolls.

Create your life.

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It was October.

No song reference this week, just a different month from which the memories came (a brief few weeks apart).

Music was not involved at all really (except perhaps my car ride).

I'm cherishing the memories created on a guys weekend when 10 of us that went to college together found - check that, made - the time to get together and enjoy each other's company for a long weekend.

Some of us had not see each other in many years (at least since graduation or someone's wedding).

We tasted whiskey on Kentucky's Bourbon Trail.

We laughed so hard and so long that our cheeks began to hurt.

We mixed and enjoyed homemade Old Fashioneds.

We attended a football game and shared our collective disgust at the outcome.

We shared memories and created more.

These are the times when we will look back and appreciate that we were able to spend some time together.

Look back and laugh (some more) at the goofy things said and done.

I'm struck by the impact of our shared experiences.

As I get older and grow my wisdom, I'm captivated by a desire to seek and create more memories than obtain more goods.

What about you?

Do you seek to create more memories?

Do you look for opportunities to share an experience with others?

Seek out occasions - make time.

Treasure the moments.

Create your life.

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“Does anyone really know what time it is? Does anyone really care…about time?” (Thank you for the lyrics, Chicago.)

We might care if/when we don't feel like we have enough.

Or perhaps when we don't “take” what we do have.

This week, my life was pretty busy and I didn't find nor take time to write.

So, I'm giving myself permission to spend only a little bit of the precious thing we call time.

This week, I chose to spend time creating memories (see my thought from last week) and chasing dreams.

Create your life.

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It was September.

It was the song by Earth, Wind, and Fire being played live by the cover band on the mall outside the Benedicta Arts Center.

It was a time to dance with my daughter like there was nobody watching (pretty much because there wasn't).

My daughter willingly allowed me to lead and do a little swinging to the music.

We were dancin' in September.

We created a memory.

When the song popped up on my playlist a few days later, it immediately took me to that time and place.

I recalled our brief and laughter-filled moment on the sidewalk, the connection between us, the fondness in my heart.

Music has an amazing way of helping us recall the sights, sounds, smells, and overall experience of something captured in our mind.

I added the song to a modern day version of the mix tape - the streaming playlist.

If you're like me, there are many songs that conjure up memories.

What is one song that pulls memories to the surface for you when you hear it play?

Play it and relive a moment in time.

Perhaps share the song with someone.

Memories are wonderful to hold and nobody can take them away.

Sometimes they are associated with music. Sometimes they are not. They settle in our minds either way.

Cherish the memories.

Create your life.

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Do you remember the Heinz Ketchup commercial?

Featuring a song by Carly Simon, the "Anticipation" commercial talked about "the taste that's worth the wait."

I wait with great anticipation to visit my college daughter this weekend. The rest of the family and I will head her way for Family Weekend at her school. We will see her in 3D for the first time since dropping her off just over a month ago.

There have been phone and video calls and text messages. Nothing can replace seeing her in person.

We have never spent this much time away from her. And this is only the beginning of the inevitable separation that occurs between a parent and their child. It's a natural progression as our kids get older.

I look forward to giving (and receiving) a great, big hug. 🤗

I look forward to the smiles and laughter. 😁

I look forward to simply being together for however long she will tolerate us. 🤪

It has not been overly long and is definitely worth the wait, much like a fresh bottle of ketchup.

What do you anticipate?

What is worth the wait?

Create your life.

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I failed.

Well, I didn't pass, which amounts to a fail.

I took an exam to earn another coaching credential and came up short of the passing score.

I knew immediately that I would re-take the exam.

There was a time when this result would have crushed me. I would have stewed about it for days. My inner critic would have destroyed me, telling me how *I* was a failure.

That's a lie, of course.

Why was this failure different?

Self-care.

The impact of not passing was significantly reduced, even eliminated, because of my recent self-care.

My self-care was primarily exercise.

A few months ago, I made a commitment to, and investment in, myself.

My consistency over the last several months created a level of resiliency I did not expect.

Consistent self-care helps us to be more resilient when life's inevitable mountains rise up in front of us.

How do you practice self-care?

👍 Exercise?

👍 Meditation?

👍 Reading?

👍 Time away from work?

👍 A movie with friends?

👍 Massage?

👍 Better sleep?

👍 Better eating?

👍 Getting outside?

👍 Cooking at home?

👍 A walk around the block?

👍 A hot bath?

👍 Saying "yes" to yourself?

Look for small ways you might incorporate self-care into your daily routine.

Look for small ways that enable you to grow, enjoy life, and thrive.

And perhaps become more resilient when life tosses a challenge or "failure" your way.

Create your life.

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The news stings for those leaving and those staying.

My employer decided a reduction in force was necessary, an action not unexpected, but still quite hard.

Some people with whom I have become close are leaving. I am staying.

Things are going to change for everyone. Some more than others.

At times like this, we all need someone to provide support and assistance, to listen and not judge. Someone on our side.

Are you wondering what comes next?

Maybe you are also wondering, what you want your future to be, what's important, how do you take time for yourself, or how do you provide support to others?

Do you want to press a "reset" button? What does "reset" even mean?

Whatever questions exist, I want to help.

Whether you are leaving or staying, I'm a coach in your corner.

I can help you find answers and discern what comes next.

If not me, I can connect you with others. Please reach out to someone and have a conversation.

You do not have take this journey alone.

Create your life.

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I classify this as another one of the "lost phrases" in our day-to-day interactions.

It's another phrase we could say more often (recently, I wrote about "please" and "thank you").

For the rest of today, notice how often you or someone else says something other than "you're welcome" in response to "thank you" or a similar expression.

Many of us (myself included) simply reply by saying

"no problem"

"you bet"

"anytime"

"no worries"

"don't mention it"

Or the ubiquitous "yup"

What other responses do you hear (or say)?

Our communication tools often provide automatic response options to an email or text message that include only alternate responses to "you're welcome."

I have been making a conscious effort to use the words "you're welcome" when the situation calls for it in verbal or written communication.

I believe saying "you're welcome" is a sign of a good leader (which is all of us!) when those words are said in response to "thank you."

After you notice the frequency of alternate responses today, I ask you - I challenge you - to say "you're welcome" when someone thanks you.

Try it as an experiment.

What might you learn?

Create your life.

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I always knew the day would come.

The day when I need to "let go" and send her off on her own.

It's here!

My "little girl" is going off to college and starting the next chapter in her life.

I feel sadness and excitement all at the same time.

Life will change for all of us. There will be a gap. That brings a bit of sadness.

She will learn more inside and outside the classroom. She will also learn more about herself. That brings more than a bit of excitement. It borders on joy!

We have prepared her well. Now it's her turn to spread her wings even wider and fly.

I take comfort in knowing she's ready.

My heart feels expansive.

The day for which we've waited is here.

Time for her to continue to create her life.

❤️