I decided it was time.

I have found that some of the most meaningful returns come from the investments we make in ourselves.

It was time for me to make an intentional choice, to make another investment. Time to invest in me.

Here are two definitions of investment from the Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary:

1️⃣ the act of investing money in something

2️⃣ the act of giving time or effort to a particular task in order to make it successful

We often think of investments primarily in financial terms. The first definition.

The second definition speaks to another type of investment, equally or perhaps more important.

In my situation, there was certainly a financial aspect.

However, it was more of a commitment to myself and my future and the future of my coaching business.

I chose to invest in a photo shoot and to get pictures taken by a professional (nothing against family members and friends who have served as photographer!).

This represented multiple investments:

👍 in myself

👍 in others

👍 in the future

As with financial investments, time will tell whether these investments will result in success.

I’m continually humbled by the people who invest in me, with their time, encouragement, and belief, especially during my photo shoot (photographer and friends).

We do better when we travel together.

What type of investment are you waiting to make?

Do you need to invest in yourself?

What's holding you back?

Create your life.

🍨

What do you think?

Does death unite us?

🤔

(Thanks for reading a longer than normal thought.)

I found out Tuesday morning that the daughter of a former co-worker passed away and her funeral service was that afternoon.

Throughout the service, I was struck by the realization that death unites us.

The unexpected departure of a loved one is horrible and the grief is real.

I witnessed many gifts during a celebration of a life filled with love.

⛪ The church was packed!

Grief needs a community and this one rallied. A positive, initial impression about a young woman I never actually met. (Her mother and I started work on the same day at our former employer.)

🌷 Friends joined a flower procession.

I learned that flowers were very meaningful to the young woman. Many tears were shed. I hope the ritual helped the friends to say goodbye in some way.

(Ever notice that we spend life learning to say hello? Nobody ever really teaches us how to say goodbye.)

👥 Many former co-workers attended.

In another heartwarming show of support, many former colleagues attended the service. What a strong sign of comfort and compassion.

🫂 A long hug line.

United by the loss, the community provided hugs. I treasure the support a simple hug can provide. You cannot give a hug without getting a hug. A hug is therapeutic for both people involved.

❤️

All in all, the humanness present at the service was profound.

Transitions challenge us. When we lose a loved one, it can be hard to understand and perhaps even harder to become someone new as a result of the passing.

The topic of death is frightening. It can be scary and intense.

The invitation is to move toward the topic and conversation, BECAUSE it's scary and intense.

During a passing transition, I like to propose two questions that might help to accept an ending and move toward a new beginning.

We get to explore the grief AND the joy related to the person who passed.

💡 What do you remember about the person you have lost?

💡 How will you keep those things alive?

This goes deeper than the usual, "I'm so sorry for your loss."

Listen and notice the positive energy shift in the conversation.

❤️

Funeral services end. People go their separate ways and return to the comfort of their routines.

Except for the people closest to the person lost.

Our challenge is to keep showing up, even when it's not painful and urgent.

(Wow. As I write this, I'm faced with a stark reminder than I need to show up for some people in my life. The pain and urgency faded for me and I want to choose to show up for them again. And again and again.)

Is there anyone you need to show up for in your life? Perhaps for the second or third time?

Provide comfort.

Enable them to dump and grieve.

Be part of their community.

👍

What are you avoiding?

I asked my client this question during a coaching session this week.

He had to think for a minute. And then admitted he was not sure.

For me, I tend to avoid things I claim as priorities and yet I choose to put them off.

Yeah, in addition to being a recovering perfectionist, I have also done my time as a world-class procrastinator.

The two are not unrelated!

While I have gotten better, I still avoid priorities.

Everything gets done, but it creates unnecessary stress and anxiety.

🤪

Do you avoid conflict and say yes to things you wouldn’t want?

Do you lose yourself in comforting routines and habits and procrastinate on unpleasant tasks?

Do you think, maybe if I let it go it will take care of itself?

Do you feel anxiety, shame, or guilt about what you avoided or procrastinated on?

You might consider these to be negative. Perhaps they are.

What if you choose to avoid being hard on yourself for saying "yes" to any of these questions?

What if you choose to avoid listening to that inner critic's voice?

Where is the gift in that avoidance?

Create your life.

🍨

I saw a great thing this morning.

Coming out of church, a mother and her daughter were hand-in-hand at the curb.

And the little girl was having the time of her life - stomping in the puddles!

"Nothing like a good puddle," I said with a smile on my face. 🙂

When we are young, we seek out the puddles. As we get older, we generally shy away from puddles. We don't want to get our feet or clothes wet. We don't want to create a scene. We choose to "act our age" instead.

What is it about a puddle? What makes a puddle so nearly irresistible to play in? Those wonderfully fun collections of water just begging for someone to disrupt with their feet or bicycle tire.

It is hard to match the pure joy of splashing in a puddle. Nothing matters except how high and how far the splatter goes. Nothing else matters!

💡

I want to break free or perhaps let go of the voices in my head that say I shouldn't do this or I'm too old to do that.

I want to feel the joy and freedom of those moments when nothing else matters.

I want to splash in more puddles.

What about you?

Create your life.

🍨

Or rather,

Do NOT should on yourself!

I should do this. I should do that. I should do this, that, and the other thing.

Enough!

Do not "should" on yourself!

You would not do that other thing to yourself that starts with the letter "s" and is four letters long. Yuck!

Do not should on yourself, either!

Where does the "should" come from, anyway?

More often that not, it comes from outside of us. Things we hear from others. Expectations from our community or "society" in general.

Sometimes it comes from our inner critic voice.

It's often rooted in a victim mindset.

How much would your perspective change if you considered everything as an opportunity rather than a requirement?

What if you said:

I get to do this. I get to do that. I get to do this, that, and the other thing.

Life is full of opportunities that we get to do. It all depends on your perspective.

You can intentionally choose a creator mindset.

What opportunities wait for you?

What is it that you get to do?

Create your life.

🍨

I have come to realize that no matter where you are on life’s journey, how young you are or how old you are, we all have the ability to choose who we want to become and the time to start is always right now.

Especially right now.

Choose today who you want to be tomorrow. We always have a choice.

💡

I choose to be a great husband and father, a great friend, a person who makes a difference in my community and the world, someone who replenishes hope.

I choose to be a sought-after person who helps others navigate and prepare for the non-financial stressors during retirement (identity, purpose, structure, and social connection).

I choose to serve as a fitness coach, helping others achieve their personal fitness goals.

These are lifelong and ongoing choices. Part of who I am and want to be at my core.

These choices are how I intentionally create my life.

👍

Who do you want to become?

Become who you want to be.

You can...

Create your life.

🍨

Do you recognize when you are not being intentional with your choices?

We have a lot going on. We're busy people. It can be easy to get lazy and let things happen "to" us. It can be easy to play the victim.

What if you made a choice to do things intentionally?

For example, how do your values help you reach your goals?

What if you identify your values and then set goals that align with those values?

Put structure into your life to "be" your values.

Intentionally decide how to put your values into action.

Decide how you will live your values.

The choices we make end up making us.

Make intentional choices about where you spend your time and energy.

Do this and witness more verve, vitality, vigor, and vibrancy in your life!

When you do things intentionally, you will

create your life.

🍨

What happens when your values get violated?

During a coaching conversation this week, my client mentioned a situation in which he reacted in a way that surprised him. Our conversation helped him realize his reaction occurred because his value of respect had been trampled on. Our emotional responses to situations often relate back to a dissonance with something core to our being. When something or someone breaches what's important to us, it can cause a stir inside. 💡

The conversation reminded me of how important respect can be.

We show respect for others when we listen to understand, not reply, and without interrupting to say what's on our mind.

We show respect for ourselves when we honor our values or exercise self care.

We show respect when we value other people's opinions and perspectives.

Respect builds relationships and fosters trust.

Where and how do you want to show more respect?

The next time you find yourself reacting strongly, reflect on which of your values got impinged.

Create your life.

🍨

As I get older (and wiser),

I appreciate the value of experiences more and more.

Experiences create lasting memories and stay with us as part of who we are, helping to shape our identity.

Experiences bring us to new places, perhaps help us to learn new skills, and enable us to form meaningful connections which enrich our lives.

Experiences provide fulfillment from shared adventures and perhaps personal milestones.

The joy of an experience lives on as we tell and retell stories.

🙌

My family has enjoyed our share of experiences over the years: camping, excursions near and far, road trips, garage beers with neighbors, walks along the beach, hiking in the woods, volunteering, the list goes on.

(gratitude)

My wife and I generally align on spending habits (thankfully!) and tend to focus on creating experiences and memories.

We recently took advantage of an opportunity to cheer for my alma mater in the College Football Playoff National Championship. #GoIrish

We did not have game tickets and decided to go anyway, for the experience.

We caught up with old friends and met lots of people.

We saw the #NDBand perform a couple of times.

We relished the tremendous energy surrounding the event.

The game's outcome was not what we hoped it would be. 👎

The overall experience made it worthwhile. 👍

When presented with an opportunity, big or small, how do you respond?

Has your appreciation for experiences shifted as you get older?

What stories do you want to tell and retell?

Create your life.

🍨

Want to remain positive and upbeat?

Try to focus on what's good instead of focusing on what's wrong.

The easy path, the path of least resistance, is to keep looking for the good on the surface.

Sometimes you might need to look under the cover.

You might need to search for the good.

The good exists.

Shift your focus there and see what happens.

Focus on what's good and avoid the trap of negativity.

Create your life.

🍨

Snoopy’s got it!

Language matters. The choices we make begin with our personal language.

There is power in how we talk to ourselves. A reframing of negative self-talk leads to an opportunity.

Consider these examples of negative self-talk and their corresponding opportunity:

👉 “I can’t” vs “I won’t” - I can't run a mile. I won't run a mile. (I choose not to run a mile.)

👉 "If only" vs "Next time" - If only I was stronger. Next time, I will build the strength I need.

👉 "It's terrible" vs "It's an experience" - Your dinner experiment is terrible. Your dinner experiment is an experience.

👉 "I should" vs "I could" - I should brush my hair. I could brush my hair (if I chose to brush my hair).

👉 "It's too difficult" vs "It takes time" - It's too difficult to learn a new skill. It takes time to learn a new skill.

What are some examples you have of negative self-talk and the corresponding opportunity?

How we say things, what we say, the words we use, it all matters.

Words especially matter when we're talking to ourselves.

We can choose the words we use.

We can choose a more positive perspective.

We can embrace Snoopy's mindset and choose to live every day.

Create your life.

🍨

The start of a new year brings a sense of freshness and chance for New Beginnings.

As promised last week, I want to share my word that will help me thrive in 2025.

My top candidates for this year's word included: Gratitude, Purpose, Intention, and Discipline.

I chose Gratitude....

Then, during a training class only six days into the new year, we started talking about New Beginnings and helping our clients to set an intention to become an Explorer in their new beginning.

That's when revelation hit.

A resonant chord was struck. 💡

Bam! Boom! Bang!

My word for 2025 is EXPLORE!

This resonates deeply with where I am in life right now.

It feels right.

I want to step into and embrace my own New Beginnings. I want adventure, to cross into the unfamiliar and back again. I want to challenge myself to go beyond my comfort zone. I want to enjoy the journey!

Each year I am amazed at how the right word presents itself.

🤔

Recall that at this time of year, in addition to choosing my word, I also like to reflect on and share the song lyrics from "Everything is Possible Now" by Clouds and Thorns. As the new year gets rolling, these words seem particularly appropriate. This song's upbeat tempo feels good and the words energize my soul.

Everything IS possible now.

💪

"As time rolls on, I won't let life leave me behind. I can see the future coming and man it's such a sight. But time will waste me if I don't stop wasting time.

Let's dream out loud. 'Cause all we know has been turned upside down. Everything is possible now."

🎶

What possibilities exist for you today, this week, this year?

Create your life.

🍨

What New Beginnings are you on the verge of exploring? Do you want help to identify YOUR one word that will enable you to Thrive in 2025? Send me a message! Everything is possible, all you need to do is ask!

☝️

Do you want to thrive in 2025?

🎉

I invite you to start the new year by choosing just One Word that will provide you with clarity, meaning, purpose, and focus throughout the next year. Skip the resolutions that become forgotten within days or weeks (80% of them gone by February).

Resolve to live this year on purpose, not by accident!

Choose One Word that will stick the entire year!

One Word is simple and powerful.

🎆 You will become more aware of your word in everything you do.

🎆 You will benefit personally, professionally, and even while playing.

🎆 You will build new habits focused around your word.

My word in 2024 was Acceptance. I wanted more acceptance of myself as a perfectly imperfect being. I also wanted more acceptance of those around me. With more acceptance would come more grace, more understanding, more compassion, and more love.

Next week, I will share my word for the new year.

What will YOUR word be that will enable you to thrive in 2025?

Create your life.

🍨

How might I help you to identify YOUR one word? Send me a message!

What are the big rocks in your life?

Are you making time for your big rocks or filling in the space with small rocks and sand?

As the year winds down and you look forward to next year, consider your big rocks.

What do you need to do to make room for what is important to you?

Choose to make room for the big rocks.

Create your life.

🍨

As the end of year arrives, give yourself permission to slow down.

Life moves fast. Every day, go, go, go! Hustling from meeting to meeting, rushing to the store, scurrying around from here to there and back again, dropping kids off at school, picking them up again, going to kid's events. We're all so busy doing things.

Ever notice how quickly everyone wants to get somewhere or do something?

What happens when you slow down?

For me, I notice the craziness around me (and sometimes my part in it). I appreciate leaves still on some trees. I notice someone's smile. I listen to the sounds. I observe the good that exists.

What might you notice? What might you appreciate in a different way?

❓

Give yourself permission to slow down so that you can:

👉 enjoy the holiday season with family and friends

👉 assess the last 50-ish weeks

👉 just "be" for a minute (or two)

You probably don't want to find yourself "Running on Empty" like Jackson Browne.

So slow down and do something to refill your cup and recharge.

💡

Here are a few ideas:

👉 take time off from work

👉 shut down the computer 30-60 minutes earlier than normal

👉 take a walk or maybe an extra walk

👉 watch TV or go to a movie

👉 read a book

👉 take a long, intentional breath

Please share what you are doing to slow down this time of year!

Create your life.

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