I find myself focusing quite a bit on gratitude these days. When I uncover things in my life to be grateful about, big and small, I encounter even more for which to be grateful. It's almost like I'm a gratitude magnet. 🧲

Even while spending most of my days at home, I find gratitude for my life, my health, my wife, my son, my daughter, my friends, good beer, enjoying friends and good beer together, sunshine, white blankets of snow, being able to go outside for a walk, having food to eat, ice cream, and so much more.

For what are you grateful?

We wrestle with challenges, loss, and pain almost every day. What possibilities arise when you start with gratitude?

Let gratitude flow out of your heart and see what flows into your life as a result.

Take time each day to be grateful.

Become a gratitude magnet.

Create your life.

"Wherever your heart is, that is where you will find your treasure. Your heart contains your dreams and wishes and knows how to deal with them. You cannot escape from your heart. It's always inside of you. It's better to listen to what it has to say. In that way, you will never be surprised. ... People are afraid to pursue their most important dreams because they feel they don't deserve them or fear they won't be able to achieve them." -- taken from The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho

❤

What an enjoyable story! I originally listened to The Alchemist a couple of weeks before I embarked on my journey to become a certified professional coach. That's what my heart said I should pursue. The timing was perfect. It was a hugely exciting moment in time for me!

What is your heart saying to you?

Take a minute. Pause. Listen.

What is your heart calling you to do?

Don't let fear get in the way. 

Listen to your heart.

Pursue your dream.

Create your life.

Dreams don't have to be "big" - they have to be yours.

Whatever you're aiming at or working towards, make sure you're doing it for YOU.

Don't do something because someone else wants you to or because society says you should.

That will likely lead to resentment and unhappiness down the road.

Take action because it's something YOU want to do.

Make it YOUR dream.

Create your life.

☀

Want to remain positive and upbeat? Try to focus on what's good instead of focusing on what's wrong. The easy path, the path of least resistance, is to keep looking for the good on the surface. Sometimes you might need to look under the cover. You might need to search for the good. The good exists. Shift your focus there and see what happens.

Focus on what's good and avoid the trap of negativity.

Create your life.

Today I revisit lyrics from the song "Everything is Possible Now" by Clouds and Thorns.

As this new year gets rolling, these words seem particularly appropriate!

"As time rolls on, I won't let life leave me behind
I can see the future coming
And man it's such a sight
But time will waste me if I don't stop wasting time
Let's dream out loud 
'Cause all we know
Has been turned upside down
Everything is possible now"

This song's upbeat tempo feels good and the words energize my soul. Everything IS possible now.

What possibilities exist for you today?

Create your life.

☀

P.S. My word for 2022 is PLAYFUL. I want to live more free-spirited and enjoy life more fully. I want to shake myself free from default behaviors and unleash more creativity. I want to be less serious, have more fun and enjoy the ride.

What is your word?

🦦 (otter)

Happy New Year!

🎉

I have an invitation for you in 2022.

I invite you to start the new year by choosing just One Word that will provide you with clarity, meaning, purpose, and focus throughout the next year. Skip the resolutions that become forgotten within days or weeks (80% of them gone by February). One Word is simple and powerful.

🎆 You will become more aware of your word in everything you do.

🎆 You will benefit personally, professionally, and even while playing.

🎆 You will build new habits focused around your word.

Resolve to live 2022 on purpose, not by accident!

Choose One Word that will stick the entire year!

My word in 2021 was bold. I wanted to show up in my work and life with courage (close second), confidence, and a fearless and daring spirit. I wanted to reveal an ability to take risks and be confident and courageous in who I am and who I want to be.

Next week, I will share my word for 2022.

What will YOUR word be?

Create your life.

What did you concoct during the last 12 months?

As the year winds down, consider taking a few moments to reflect.

What have you created this year?

👍

Please allow me to share some of what my #creativity included:

🎵 Brewing two batches of beer with my son – Hefeweizen and Saison

🎵 Cooking new dinner recipes and preparing food in different ways

🎵 Launching a Dads group with my daytime employer

🎵 Helping to create fun account team meetings with my daytime employer

🎵 Introducing an approach to help men and Dads get their verve back

🎵 Continuing to write #ThursdayThoughts every week (this is #140)

This "year in review" reminded me - especially considering our continued state of the world - that life's what you make it.

Check out these lyrics sung by Graham Colton: "Life's what you make it. It's there for the taking."

🎶

What are you making with your life?

Are you living a life that aligns with your values and gives you fulfillment?

Do you make intentional choices about where to spend your time and energy?

What does your life balance look and feel like?

⚖

Perhaps more important than looking back is to look toward the next 12 months.

What song are you writing?

What are you ready to start?

Create your life.

# # # # #

Life's What You Make It - Song by Graham Colton

Take in all the sunshine

Bottle up the rain

Go where the wind blows

Let it show the way

Open all the windows

Let in all the light

You can pull the stars down

Paint the perfect sky

So go and write your song

The world will sing along

Oh a-oh a-oh

Life's what you make it

Oh a-oh a-oh

It's yours for the taking

You can test the water

You might as well jump in

And we don't know where we'll end up

So you might as well begin

Memories you're making

You frame inside in your heart

In the middle of a nowhere

Is a somewhere you can start

So go and write your song

The world will sing along

Oh a-oh a-oh

Life's what you make it

Oh a-oh a-oh

It's yours for the taking

Go and write your own song

All the world will sing along

When you find your melody

We'll join in, in harmony

👍🎶🎵

"The best way to predict the future is to create it." - Peter Drucker, business/management expert

(This quote gets attributed to Abraham Lincoln, too.)

Too bad the 🎱 and a 🔮 cannot really help you to predict the future.

Bummer, right?! 🤪

Several years ago, I decided to predict my future and embarked on a personal growth journey, a self improvement tour.

My journey continues after consuming many books, podcasts, blog posts, training classes, and working with multiple professional coaches.

It's a journey that never ends, until, well, there is no more tomorrow.

What are you doing to predict the future?

Choose to create it.

Be intentional.

Start with baby steps. Small things lead to big differences.

Resolve to make a change in yourself and start to predict the future.

Start to predict YOUR future.

Create your life.

Do you see it? It's all around me. Is it all around you, too?

I've become fascinated with, intrigued by, and much more aware over the last several years of my own loneliness as a man and father and notice how prevalent this condition appears to be in our society.

When I saw the Saturday Night Live sketch titled "Man Park" a couple of weeks ago, I found it funny and oh so true of my own experience. (Visit YouTube and search "Man Park - SNL" to watch "A commercial (that) advertises an outdoor park made especially for men.")

We (*I*) have a strong desire for connection, especially with other men and Dads.

As males, we tend to lose our ability to deeply connect with others somewhere in our high school and college years.

Society tells us to achieve more, to get promoted, to get a raise, and then another. It's never enough. We receive conditioning that encourages "success" and prohibits close relationships. This all makes meaningful connections with others, particularly men, increasingly difficult and appear further out of reach.

The focus shifts toward being Providers, Pro-creators, and Protectors.

Each time I see the question, “Who would you call in the middle of the night if you were sick or afraid?” I come up with a fairly short list (my own judgement).

I'm on a journey to change my answer and help others to change their answer, too.

For me, the journey started with a dose of vulnerability. It's hard to even consider you're lonely much less take steps to do something about it.

Small steps lead to big things. What might begin with a simple "hi" or "wanna grab a beer" can lead to brilliant conversations and kinship. Engage in discussions that extend beyond sports and the weather. Become curious about the other person.

The journey takes time. A journey I believe is well worth the effort.

Think of it as an adventure. We get to explore happier lives, families, and marriages and become healthier as well.

You benefit, we benefit, our friends and family benefit, society benefits.

You're worth it.

Create your life.

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Do you want more connection and camaraderie in your life? Stay tuned for opportunities in 2022. If you want to learn more or just have someone you can talk with, schedule time for us to chat at https://markstaelgraeve.as.me/breakthrough.

Less than 30 days left in 2021! Have you taken steps toward becoming who you aspire to be? Have you taken steps toward what you hope to accomplish?

.

Sometimes we feel like giving up and quitting. Things become hard to do. We doubt our ability, knowledge, or worthiness. We struggle. We doubt ourselves.

We run out of time.

You can still take meaningful steps forward, even if they are small steps. Move toward your destination even if you will not reach it when desired.

You can and will be someone great. You can and will create great things.

You need to keep going.

Don't let fear hold you back.

Fear is a liar.

You are good enough, smart enough, and talented enough.

Keep going - all the way to the end of the year and into next year.

Create your life.

.

If you feel like time is running out and want support to take meaningful steps forward, schedule time for us to chat at https://markstaelgraeve.as.me/breakthrough.

I am grateful for family and friends, health, smiles, laughter, sunshine, and family gatherings.

Take a moment today and reflect on those people and things for which you are grateful.

Maybe even take a gratitude walk, 5-10 minutes spent saying thanks for your blessings.

We have much for which to be thankful.

Create your life.

Have you ever discovered something in an unexpected way?

.

.

It happened to me this week. My heart filled (more like over-filled) with gratitude and honor when I discovered that a former basketball player at my alma mater personally named me to be invited to attend his upcoming "hall of fame" presentation and dinner reception. There is a large group attending a game and post-game reception in his honor. He included me in a small group getting together the evening before.

He played when I was a student manager over 30 years ago. I haven't seen him in 20-ish years.

His invitation to me says something about him as a man and fellow human being.

I am also realizing that I have been showing up and creating my legacy for a long time, like my entire life. Wow.

What I did and how I showed up is emerging all these years later. It's humbling to consider the "stickiness" we leave behind throughout life.

Deep, deep gratitude and LOTS of feels.

❤

How do you choose to show up at work, at school, in life?

Have you uncovered the significance of showing up as your authentic self?

What legacy are you creating through the way you live each day?

Live in a way that honors your values.

Don't listen to your inner critic voices that say "it's not the right time" or "it's too late" or some such nonsense.

It is always the right time to live in a way that aligns with your values.

Make the choice today to start or continue what you've already begun.

Set goals aligned with who you aspire to become and how you want to show up in your world.

Lay the foundation. Build on the foundation that exists. You never know when the substance of your life will resurface.

Create your legacy.

Create your life.

.

Would you find benefit in exploring your values or discovering how to align them with your goals and building your foundation?

Schedule time for us to chat at https://markstaelgraeve.as.me/breakthrough.

This world is messed up. And yet, there is also a lot of good in the world.

We can all help to make our world a good place or at least a better place. A kind place.

We can all spread kindness.

.

World Kindness Day is celebrated each year on November 13th. #WorldKindnessDay 2021 is on a Saturday.

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Two of my favorite ways to infuse kindness into someone's day:

🙂 Smile

🚪 Hold the door open

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Other ways to #inspirekindness:

❤ Write a note and leave it for someone to find

❤ Practice gratitude

❤ Tell someone you love them

❤ Give someone a hug

❤ Buy coffee for a stranger

❤ Help a classmate with their homework

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How do you #spreadkindness? Do you have a favorite? Please share in the comments!

Create your world. Make it one based on kindness.

Create your life.

Be kind.

You lead a successful life. That is how it appears to others. Yet you feel you are failing on all fronts.

You're successful because you put your all into everything you do.

Do you have anything left to give?

If your family is like mine, y'all are addicted to food and shelter. Your family depends on you to support these addictions.

You're the provider.

While you have been providing for your family, you might feel that you have missed out on a lot in your family's life.

You may even begin to feel like you have lost a bit of yourself and are not sure how to get back to the core of who you really are.

It's okay to admit it, you're lost!

It's also okay to admit what you truly want and make intentional choices about where you direct your energy.

Stop holding yourself to the highest standards in everything you do.

Embrace the gray, that middle ground in between the high and low standards.

You will discover that there is LOTS of space for fulfillment in this middle ground.

You will discover that you can enjoy balance with your family and career.

You will discover verve, vitality, and vigor.

Create your life.

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Do you want to explore how you might embrace the gray and rediscover balance?

Schedule time for us to chat at https://markstaelgraeve.as.me/breakthrough.

Do you need a break? Do you feel burned out? Sometimes we just gotta get away from it all.

I am fortunate to be able to get out of town two of the last three weekends. Once for a long weekend and once just for the day.

One of my top values is family.

You would not always know this is the case given my addiction to work.

These recent weekends away from home served to help me reconnect with what and who means the most to me.

My getaways helped me to

✔ reconnect with nature

✔ reaffirm my belief in God

✔ offer perspective

✔ spur creativity

How do you (re)connect with what's important to you?

You do not need to leave town, you can simply take a walk around the block or call a friend and get "lost" in good conversation.

Do you need to get away?

Create your life.

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Do you seek support to connect with what and who is important to YOU?

Schedule time for your VERVE Breakthrough Session at https://markstaelgraeve.as.me/breakthrough.

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Get Your Verve Back! Join me for a masterclass on November 3rd and the best 45 minutes you will spend all week.

Get your seat now at https://www.markstaelgraeve.com/get-your-verve-back